Doc Love Dating Advice

                          Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
                                Success Coach - Doc Love
Hi Doc,

One thing I've noticed since I've started using your System is that most women would rather be right than happy. I work in a small office with a lot of married women. My social life often comes up as a topic of discussion because I go on a lot of dates (still looking for the girl with the right attitude). It’s interesting how the women I work with have developed a "How dare he!" attitude towards me whenever I use a method I learned from you.  

After a good first date, the next day I am always asked when I plan to call again. "In about a week", I tell them, which always infuriates these women. They call me a "Game player" or just plain old mean. Yeah, it's real mean to buy a girl dinner, make her laugh, and walk her to her door like a gentleman. They tell me I HAVE to call her in a day or so and tell her what a good time I had and how I can't wait to see her again. When I refuse, they lose it.

I get responses like "How is she gonna know if you like her?" My favorite answer to that is "Why in the world would I be taking her out, if I didn't like her?" Ironic how it’s girls who will go out with a guy that they have no interest in, but in their minds it’s the guy who must let the woman know how he feels about her from the start.

I watch time and time again as my female officemates give advice to the other two single guys in the office. When that advice inevitably blows up in those guy’s faces, the women never EVER take responsibility for screwing things up for the poor saps. But hey, I have to say that those guys deserve what they get for it for asking a woman for advice about another woman.

When I try to help these guys out, the women say "Don't listen to him, he hates women! He hates marriage!" Well if I'm such a rotten guy and they are so happy in their marriages, then why are they so interested in my social life?

I never mention that I am using your System. They would crucify me if they knew that. But I can't understand why they are so offended by what I do.  I tell them that I am waiting a week to call to make myself more mysterious and intriguing to the girls I date. Well, my female office mates simply will not have it.  

They think that I am doing these things simply for the glorification of my own ego or as some sort of punishment to all women. They refuse to acknowledge that these things would make THEM happy in their marriages if their husbands had the guts. I asked the one single girl at the office if a guy did all the things that I do, would it make her more interested in him. She said, get this, "Well yeah... but that doesn't mean he should do it." SAY WWHHATTT!!!!!

Has the "empowerment" of women really blinded them so much? Have Madonna and Oprah made it so important for a women to be in control that a guy is not allowed to do whatever it takes to make a girl like him more? Simply put: It’s their own fault that they can't find a gentleman. They fall for these cheeseball guys who throw corny line after corny line at them, like those loser dorks on "Friends". Then when the actions of these guys do not measure up to their sappy words, these women get heart broken and become more guarded and vow "Never to let a man control them again!!!"  

Women in this country need to be re-educated more than ever! They need to take a look in the mirror and say, "There's nothing wrong with a man being a man." Only problem is, who's gonna tell them this, Oprah?  

Colin – who wants your input on this topic

Hey Colin,

The answer to your question is: Yes. As goofy as it might sound to some, it’s absolutely true that Oprah and Madonna have trained womenfolk to make being in control such a high priority that a guy, in their eyes, is not allowed to do whatever it takes to make a girl like him more. For a man to do anything as such is considered not only politically incorrect but politically illegal. (Although this Orwellian standard seems to apply only to the male gender.)

Apparently, it’s perfectly fine for women to have their dozens and dozens of monthly magazines with covers touting articles such as: "Seven Secret Strategies to Make Him Fall Hopelessly in Love With You" and "Love Spells - Advice from a White Witch Shows You How to Have Him Wrapped Around Your Little Finger In No Time." But if a man employs any strategy other than "Just be totally open and honest" to win a woman’s heart, then he’s a game-playing, deceitful, manipulative, womanizing, user-abuser who can’t be blamed and shamed enough. (And I thought the women’s movement was supposed to be about equality!)

You, Colin, have been unfairly exposed to intense criticism in your work place for sharing that you deliberately do things to make the girls that you date, see you as more of a Challenge. But the flak that you’ve encountered would pale in comparison to what you’d experience if you were to share what you shared, with a TV studio filled full of female Oprah–ites. Can you imagine the venom that would be spewed at you if you revealed, on camera, that you always waited a week to call a girl back after your first date with her? I mean they would be crying out to lynch you right then and there.

And here’s the absurd thing. Those women have no comprehension that they want and need a man who uses "The System." You see, Colin, women are incredibly intuitive, so much more than men are, and yet amazingly, a majority of them are in ignorance and denial about what motivates them in love.  

Most of Oprah’s audience would dispute the value of Challenge and debate you on its efficacy till their last dying breath. Yet those very same women, would and will give their hearts to a man who embodies Challenge. Pretty weird, huh?  

And as you mentioned, Colin, many, many women have been burned romantically due to their own poor choices. (Remember, everyone, it’s women, not men, who do the choosing in relationships.) They’ve chosen the selfish jerks, the flowery flatterers, the vapid pretty boys and the braggarts over the less glittery good guys with heart and soul. So they’re bitter, and they keep their hearts shut down as a way of protecting themselves. And when a woman is bitter, the idea of a man doing anything to empower himself in the courtship process is very threatening.

So the truth is that many women would simply rather remain pissed off at men than be happy. They’re addicted to being in control and yet they secretly yearn for a man of integrity who will take control and keep them guessing for awhile. Their ticket out of this kind of no-win situation is to have the good fortune to date a man who is a serious student of "The System." That would be a consciousness and heart expanding experience that could woo the most bitter beauty, tame the most shrewish shrew and melt the heart of the queen of the Amazons. (Yes, even Madonna.)  

As far as your work situation goes, here’s my advice to you Colin. You’ve shared enough about your dating strategies with the women in your office. It can be entertaining and educational to observe the responses of various females to Doc Love’s controversial dating strategies, as long as you’re willing to take the heat that goes along with it. But, as you’ve already surmised, if you were to share further details about "The System" with your female co-workers, they would, indeed "go ballistic" on you. And why get yourself embroiled in conflict and controversy at your workplace?

So next time they get in your face, just tell them what they want to hear, then smile and walk away. You don’t need any more negativity from them.

Remember, guys: the key to women is Challenge, in spite of what everyone says.

To send me your love questions or to find out more about "The System," visit me at or call (800) 404-2644.  

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"    

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