Doc Love Dating Advice
DOES LEONARDO DICAPRIO EVER HAVE TROUBLE KNOWING WHEN TO GO FOR THE KISS?
Women Don’t Lie - Men Don’t Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love
I’m 18 years old and completely in love with Jenna. She’s gorgeous and in my senior high school class and we’ve been talking for more than a month now. You might find this hard to believe, but I’ve had dates with lots of girls before. Jenna’s only had one boyfriend before me. I know him and he’s a complete klutz.
A few days ago I invited Jenna to go to a movie that she wanted to see. Since we had some schedule confusion, she surprisingly called me to arrange the date and everything was set.
After the movie was over, we ended up talking for a half-hour until her mother called Jenna’s cell phone and said she was waiting for her in the parking lot. At that point, I gave her a gift of a CD of her favorite band that she mentioned she wanted. She was ecstatic about my thoughtfulness and gave me a huge hug.
Doc, at that moment I knew that I should kiss her, but I didn’t because everything happened so fast. I knew that I’d missed an opportunity, and I’ve felt frustrated about it ever since.
Jenna and I now have a date to go to a concert she wants to attend. I’m afraid the same thing is going to happen again – the moment to kiss her will come and go and again I won’t have done anything. The problem is that I don't know when I should give her a first kiss. She is very hard to catch, Doc. I believe that Jenna likes me, but sometimes I’m not really sure. Does that make sense?
What do you think, Doc? I've never tried to kiss a hard-to-catch girl before. The other girls I went out with were easy to read, but not this one.
I hope you can help me because I’m very interested in this girl, and I’m sure I’m not the only guy in a similar situation.
Ronde - who’s a little mixed-up
It’s just fabulous that you’re completely in love with Jenna. But never lose sight of the fact that there’s something much more important going on here. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love says, “What are her feelings towards you, Junior?” Guys, it’s her Interest Level that counts – not yours.
Hey, I believe you’ve had dates with lots of girls, Ronde. But when you looked at them, they sort of just blended into the crowd. Jenna – a double for Kate Beckinsale -- looks like she materialized straight off the cover of Elle magazine. And that means you have to be extra careful and really know what you’re doing or you’ll get eaten alive. Remember, no matter how sweet and innocent she appears, you’re still dealing with the MOST DANGEROUS CREATURE ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET. Leopards, jaguars, cheetahs and tigers are beautiful to look at too.
Sure, Jenna’s only had one boyfriend in her life – and she’s rejected 2,000 others who’ve been coming on to her since she was 13! And by the way, Ronde, why would you want someone who digs klutzes?
When Jenna called you to set up your date after all that schedule conflict and confusion, she was doing you a big favor. To you Psych majors, she cleaned up your mess. But once her Mommy called her on her cell phone, you should have taken Jenna straight home. Remember, you don’t want to tick off her folks since you’re both still in high school.
Now let me get this straight. You presented Jenna with a gift on your very first date? Jeez, pal, why didn’t you just the buy her the engagement ring while you were shopping? I mean, why waste time?
Now let’s get on to what’s really bugging you. Ronde, you’re wrong thinking that you have to kiss Jenna the minute you get within three feet of her. In fact, you shouldn’t have kissed her. You’re putting way too heavy a trip on yourself.
Listen up: you’re not going to kiss this girl at all. This girl’s going to kiss you (assuming you stop making blunders!).
So don’t feel frustrated, guy. Believe it or not, you did the right thing by not going for it. See, everybody tries to kiss this girl. You’ll just be one of a whole flock of turkeys if you force the issue. But you’re going to stand out because you’re different from the rest of her fans and worshippers.
So now you two are going to a concert. Hm…I detect a pattern here. Jenna picks the concerts…she picks the movies…and she picks the times you get together. What do you ever get to pick? As my cousin General Love once said, “Is she going to tell you when you can talk after you get married?” Or as Doctor Freud put it, “Sonny, are you trying to do a perfect impersonation of Wimpus Americanus?”
Nevertheless, I still don’t want you to do anything when it comes to kissing. You’re doing just fine as you are. You’ll kiss this girl only after she begs you to kiss her.
Jenna’s not hard to catch, dude. She’s coming right at you, in case you haven’t noticed. She cleans up your messes and you’re going out on a second date. So just keep smiling and showing her your teeth and your shiny shoes. And don’t forget to show her a little Challenge while you’re at it. You don’t want to be a doormat even before you say, “I do.”
My friend, you’re not really sure Jenna digs you only because she’s so gorgeous and you don’t have any experience with a real woman. So of course it makes sense that you’re confused about whether or not she likes you -- especially considering the source!
But seriously, it’s great that she’s not so easy to read. Like my cousin Sal “The Fish” Love says, “It means she hasn’t been out with the rugby team.”
Make no mistake, though -- every guy at school loves this girl. Even the tenth-graders love her. Like the old cowboy saying goes, “They say she’s old, but she’s a knockout!”
But always remember that guys do the picking, but women do the choosing.
Remember, guys: you have to conserve yourself and not rush in; otherwise you’re going to lose her to another guy.
To hear my CALL-IN RADIO SHOW, send me your love questions or to find out more about “The System,” visit me at http://www.doclove.com or call (800) 404-2644. Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”
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