Doc Love Dating Advice

                 Women Don’t Lie - Men Don’t Listen
                           Success Coach - Doc Love

Hey Doc,

After all these years of reading your column, I can honestly say that I’ve never gotten tired of it and have learned so much from you that I would regard myself as on the road to mastery, if such a thing can ever be achieved when it comes to the opposite sex. And now, having you on the radio is an even bigger bonus! I hope you become more popular than Howard Stern! Lord knows it would help all the hapless guys in the world. Which leads me to my request.

I watch many of my friends blow it with women they really want. Sadly, I had to place myself in this same category, until, as I said, I discovered your techniques and transformed myself from a loser with women into a winner. And I’ve seen my buddies do it all – call their women too often, indulge their whims with expensive gifts and dinners, and then kiss their lovely butts after the women treated them like crap and rejected them for other, less worthy guys. It’s been an ugly sight to behold, Doc.

I wonder if you would grace us with a list of the top behaviors that make a woman’s Interest Level drop. Then we could all print the column out and paste it onto our computers or carry it in our wallets as a sort of “first watch” checklist. You know, something along the lines of “TOP DEADLIEST MISTAKES MEN MAKE TO FORCE A WOMAN’S INTEREST LEVEL INTO THE TOILET” -- that sort of thing. Seriously, I think it would be of aid to millions of men the world over. And there’s a hidden agenda for me here, too. I’m dating a woman now who’s a 9.5 and I don’t want to make some of the blunders I’ve made in the past.

Anyway, thanks again for all your help, Doc. You are truly the greatest love doctor who ever lived.

Payton - who’d like to see it all spelled out

Hi Payton,

It is actually possible to achieve mastery when it comes to the opposite sex, my friend. Of course such mastery isn’t achieved overnight. It takes months, years, of work to come even close to handling women. But I want you to go back in time and think about the day the Dating Dictionary arrived in your mailbox and you were just unwrapping it. Do you remember how clueless you were about the girls at that moment? Now, how much do you know about the fairer sex today? There’s your answer. That’s what’ll tell you how far you’ve come. And, no doubt, if you’ve memorized my book and put its principles into practice like an accomplished artist, you’re a heck of a lot better off than you were back then.

Like my cousin Brother Love says, “TRUTH, not falsehood, leads to wisdom and awareness.” And that’s my job – to lift the fog for you guys. What you’re saying, Payton, is that my techniques have brought you closer to holding your own in the war. And make no mistake, as my cousin General Love says, “It’s total war out there!”

So congratulations on turning yourself from a loser to a winner. And on your road to mastery, I’m sure you learned the truth of whether the lovely and beautiful Beth O is with Howard Stern because of his drop-dead good looks or because of that half-a-billion-dollar contract he’s going to be bringing down from satellite radio.

You talk about the “less worthy” guys your friends lost their women to. Actually, they only appear to be less worthy. Deep down, they’re really bad guys. And some ladies dig bad guys, because they’re what we call “Negative Challenges.” Why do you think a wrinkled old coot like Jack Nicholson still attracts female attention?

But yes, you’re right, the torture that guys are subjected to at the hands of the ladies is ugly to behold, buddy. But isn’t it funny that when you finally get hip to what’s really going on, it all becomes as clear as day? You go out to a club and you notice that the girls are yawning and looking around the room with absolutely no Interest Level, and the guys hitting on them are making fools of themselves, and they don’t even see it even though their faces are a mere 18 inches apart. But you see it, dude. Amazing, isn’t it?

So, you’d like to see a list of the main things that lower Interest Level…. Well, have you ever noticed that 90% of the time guys don’t get past the first date and can’t score a second date? Why is that? After all, she went out with you and appeared to have a good time (or at least you thought she did) --  so what the heck happened? What did you do wrong?

Paste the following boners up on your computer screen:

1. YOU TALK TOO MUCH. Most guys yak way too much. They talk about things that don’t raise Interest Level. They don’t even think to ask themselves, “Is this going to help my cause?” No, they just blabber. Quit blabbering, guys.

2. YOU TALK DOWN TO THE WOMAN. In reality, she’s twice as smart as you are. Now how intelligent is that?

3. YOU BS. You all know that my articles are rated GP, so I have to say this as delicately as possible: guys fling the horse manure. And here’s the problem with BS – she’s got built-in radar. She knows when you’re telling the truth. She knows how to perceive sincerity. She knows that you weren’t really an all-state first-team quarterback and that you’re not writing bestselling novels under a pseudonym.

4. YOU TALK ABOUT SEX. It’s a turn-off. It might work in Hollywood movies, but it turns out that the girl you’re taking out is conservative. She actually goes to church and she’s a nice girl. The last thing she wants to hear from you is bad dialogue out of a porn flick. Yet you insist on doing your worst imitation of Ron Jeremy. Drop it.

5. YOU DON’T WALK ERECT. Don’t laugh. This falls under the heading of personal grooming. Some guys don’t walk – or look -- like human beings. It might have worked for Keith Richards when he snagged his hot young model wife, but then again, you don’t have his zillions in the bank. And don’t forget to get a haircut, take a good shower (and use soap), and make sure you don’t have holes in your wardrobe. It’s basic, but lots of men forget the basics. It’s like trying to play basketball without knowing how to dribble or shoot. On the other hand, if you’re in the band, it doesn’t matter – the dirtier the better.

Above all, keep your mouth shut unless it’s light and funny. For more tips, check out my books.

Remember, guys: unless it lifts her Interest Level, why are you talking about it?

To send me your love questions, listen to my call-in talk show, or to find out more about “The System,” visit me at or call (800) 404-2644.

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”

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