Doc Love Dating Advice

                                            Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
                                                   Success Coach - Doc Love

Dear Doc,

I’ve got a question for you. I know that you make a big deal about how important it is to get a girl that you’re interested in to give you her home phone number. I agree with you. I’ve noticed that one of the tactics that women use to politely blow you off is to offer you their work number instead of their home number.  

But there’s an obvious third option that I haven’t heard you talk about that kind of confuses the issue. What about the cell phone number? Where does the cell phone fit into your “Only accept her home phone number” policy?

It’s confusing because the cell phone is a kind of in-between thing. Looking at it one way, you could say that the cell phone number is an even more personal and intimate thing for a girl to give a guy because she carries her cell phone with her on her “person.” Also, it’s often easier to get hold of a girl on her cell phone? What do you say, Doc? Is it OK to accept a girl’s cell phone number in place of her home phone number?  

Marshall – who wants to know what the difference is

Dear Marshall,

Excellent question.

These days it seems that most everyone has a cell phone. They’re an integral part of life in the 21st Century. Many people spend considerably more time talking on their cell phones than they do talking on their home phones. All right. So where does that leave us?

It’s true that it’s often easier to get hold of a girl on her cell phone, but so what? It’s the home phone that’s more personal. Why? Because it’s at the place where she actually lives, where she eats and sleeps and bathes. Her home is an actual location. When you’re talking to her on her cell phone you don’t know where she is. When you’re talking to her on her home phone, you know exactly where she is.
When a girl wants to give you her cell phone number in lieu of her home phone number, it means that she doesn’t want you to know where she’s located at any given time. She doesn’t want you to know any specifics about where she lives.  To you Psych majors, It means that her Interest Level is low.

And besides, I don’t want you talking to her when she’s driving and about to go through a tunnel where the connection might drop off. I don’t want you calling to ask her out while she’s at work and is having to deal with her boss who keeps coming on to her. I don’t want you reaching her while she’s out on a date with some other guy. When you call her for that first date, I want her to be in her safe comfy home environment, with no distractions, all relaxed and ready to give you her full attention.

Whenever you ‘close’ a girl for her phone number you should always say the same five magic words that I always coach you guys to say: “What’s your HOME phone number?” Don’t be concerned if it feels like you’re being abrupt or too direct when you ask her. I want you to catch her off guard. It’s a way of testing her (true) Interest Level.

Once those five magic words have left your lips, be silent. If you notice that she starts to squirm or fidget or hem and haw, don’t help her. Look deeply into her eyes. Stare her down. Don’t crack and speak again before she speaks. This is a test of her Interest Level and a test of your character. Watch and listen. Her body language will tell a whole story before she even says a word.

When (and if) she gives you her number, ask her, “Is this your HOME phone number?” If she says, “No it’s my cell number. It’s the easiest way to get hold of me.” then you should say, “Great,  what’s your home phone number?” If you never get the home number out of her, then put her on probation and wait two weeks to call her. But don’t expect her to keep any date that she makes with you. Why? Because she wouldn’t give you her HOME phone number.

Remember, guys, nothing beats the home phone number.

To send me your love questions or to find out more about “The System,” visit me at or call (800) 404-2644.  

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”  

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